Can't Sleep

I can't sleep.  I am exhausted.  but I can't sleep.  I have been like this for a couple of weeks.  I hate it when I go through this.  I know some of this stems from current frustrations.  One I talked about in my family blog here and here.  (hmmm...maybe the AWANA verse Philippians 2:14 isn't just for the 6 year old. "Do everything without arguing or complaining.")

Today we revisited Pastor's church at the request of the 6 year old.  He wanted to go to Sunday School.  That is usually the second step when looking for a church for us.  New classes just started here.  We attended one where they are going through a book called "Crazy Love."  I haven't read it or even heard of it.  But the premise is interesting.

Last time we visited here, no one spoke to us.  We came in, sat, listened, left. It was VERY disheartening - especially considering I had been in a bible study weekly, my kids were in AWANA weekly.  Husband was left feeling cold.  I was too.

This time was completely different.  I don't know if it was me or if there is some excellent change happening here. Some exciting stuff.  The SS class was big and discussion was difficult, but the video was interesting and I'm willing to try the book.  The 6 year old declared his class to be 'awesome!' - a word he does NOT use often.

And the message - from my favorite gospel.  Mark.  He says it like it is without adding a bunch of extra words!  short. sweet and too the point.  Mark has always been my favorite gospel.  Thankfully, there was kids church which allowed us to attend to the message.  A message of forgiveness.  Don't we all need that?

During communion, boy asked why he couldn't get some.  We, being the wise (ha!) parents that we are, told him he couldn't partake until he understood what it was all about.  Never underestimate the boy's mind.  In the car on the way to lunch, we started asking him about communion. Starting with what the bread and wine stood for.  Without missing a beat, "Jesus body and blood." Why to we do this? "To remember that he died on the cross for our sins." Why did he do that? "Because God loves us."

I think the boy understands it.  I don't know what to do now.  We don't have a 'home' church.  But, I did have someone spontaneously give me a hug today at Pastor's church and it felt so wonderful.  It has been so long since I have had a spontaneous hug.  I have to request them from the kids and husband.  Not the same.  And today-I really needed it.   There is work going on in my heart and it isn't easy.  Please pray for sleep...6am is awfully early!