Two Months In...

When hubby and I agreed to read the One Year Chronological Bible together again, I had NO idea the journey I was being sent on.  If I knew,  I wonder if we would be reading the bible in it's entirety this year.   I likely would have quit or not started.  But I've done this much, might as well keep going!

Then Pastor's 'Know God' study happened ... and the digging started. Digging into my soul. Dredging up the pain, grief, hurts. Initiating healing.

I have spent more time in the church sanctuary these months.  I have cried, yelled, sobbed, sang, slept, prayed and sat quietly listening for God's quiet whisper.  I have bugged Pastor with my questions more than I should have.  I have searched and realized that not all questions will be answered, but I will keep asking.  And searching for answers.  The more I learn, the less I know.

I have stepped out of my comfort zone ... and right back into it.  And God has been nudging me out of it again.

I have seen prayers answered, had snaps in sanity, experienced Satan's wrath, and experienced the love, grace and mercy of God in some amazing people.

I know the journey isn't over. I know there are still rough roads ahead.  And I have been told that things may still get worse before they get better.

But

I am hanging in there. Working on inner healing, bridging that heart/head gap, and continuing to study God's word.  I am NOT giving up!!!  (but please keep praying!)