Prayers - answered.

This has been a week of weeks.  However, God has continually shown that he is here.  Right here. In the same room with me.  If anyone asks I tell them honestly that this journey is for the birds.  I am not enjoying it. I do not recommend it. I want it to end.  But - I do know that I am not alone.

Two requests made to two different people yesterday...
1. That God would bring new friends into my life.  Ones like my dear friend that I called during bath time when my newly adopted son had emptied the entire contents of the tub onto the bathroom floor and I was so terrified I would beat him that I called her.  She came, tucked him into bed, cleaned the mess and talked and listened.  (of course she can't really be replaced. I KNOW that.)

2. That God would heal me. soon. Not in his usual slow-pokiness way.

Some results by 8:30am today...
-had a conversation with a gal from church last night.  This morning we were on the phone chatting by 8:30am (no - still not sleeping).  Her first impression of me was that I wouldn't have time for anyone. I am too busy.  I will admit that I do keep myself back from new people and am weary about getting to know them.  Especially right now.  She just had a way...just drew me in.  Fraility, fragility and all.

-went to the sanctuary to pray and ponder some verses given to me by a wise woman.  It was around 12.  As I was starting to read the verses, a thought popped into my head - go to her house. I shook it off.  Repeat - a little louder. a little more forceful.  Continued to ignore it.  Finally I couldn't even read the bible. This 'thought' was too intrusive.  And then, this thought... "You have been alone enough.  Go. It is ok to spend time with others.  Go. You don't need to be alone."

So. I went to my car, started the engine and called her.  "Sure. Absolutely. Come on over."  So I went until I had to get the girlchild for an MD appt.  It was one of, if not 'the' most relaxing and peaceful few moments I have had in 6+ weeks.

God answered.  He answered quickly - just not the 'what' I requested, but he showed me he does have non-slow-poke tendencies.

Is everything all shiny and rosey? No. Why would I want an invitation to a place where I can't curl up and listen to people being real?  I want/need real.

But God did answer.  He is here.  I am still a mess.  Please keep praying.